The Importance of Protecting Young Minds, Online. {Episode 44 with Kristen Jenson}
Find Good Pictures Bad Pictures on Amazon*: Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids
.
Protect Young Minds (Kristen’s website with LOTS of great articles.)
3 Things Kids Need Before they go on the Internet:
The CAN-DO PLAN (explained fully in Good Pictures Bad Pictures book.) This is a plan for what kids should do when they see a “bad picture.”
A: ALWAYS tell a trusted adult. This removes secrecy. Invites the “thinking brain” in!
N: Name it! Label it. This helps switch from using your “feeling brain” to the “thinking brain.”
D: Distract your thoughts. Choose a positive thought to turn to. Train your brain to go there instead.
O: ORDER your thinking brain to be in control. This is an intentional choice.
A few stats from the Covenant Eyes Website:
- In 2008***, more than 560 college students responded to an online survey:
- – 93% of boys and 62% of girls were exposed to pornography before 18.
- – 14% of boys and 9% of girls were exposed to pornography before 13.
- – 69% of boys and 23% of girls have spent at least 30 consecutive minutes viewing Internet pornography on at least one occasion. 63% of boys have done so more than once, and 35% of boys have done so on more than 10 occasions.
- – 83% of boys and 57% of girls have seen group sex online.
- – 69% of boys and 55% of girls have seen same-sex intercourse online.
- – 39% of boys and 23% of girls have seen sexual bondage online.
- – 32% of boys and 18% of girls have seen bestiality online.
- – 18% of boys and 10% of girls have seen rape or sexual violence online.
- – 15% of boys and 9% of girls have seen child pornography
- ***This was 12 years ago so you can only imagine these numbers have skyrocket since!
Recent statistics from the Guardchild website:
-
- 90% of kids between ages 8-16 have seen pornography online.
- Law Enforcement officials estimate that there are over 50,000 sexual predators online at any given moment.
- 22% of teenage girls say they have posted nude or semi-nude pictures of themselves on the internet.
- (Lots more over there!)
Pornhub, the world’s most popular porn website, reports that in 2017, there were:
- – 28.5 billion annual visits to the website.
- – 81 million daily average visits.
- – 25 billion searches performed.
- – 50,000 searches per minute.
- – 800 searches a second.
**Now excuse me while I throw up. (seriously, isn’t this a scary internet world!?)
But wait — there’s good news! 🙂 A GIVEAWAY!
You can find the Boy Mom Podcast on all of the podcast platforms…here are just a few of them:
Or you can listen right here! 🙂
Kristen A. Jenson is the author of the Good Pictures Bad Pictures series of read-aloud books including the best-selling Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids and Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.: A Simple Plan to Protect Young Minds. Kristen is the founder of ProtectYoungMinds.org, a website dedicated to helping parents empower their kids to resist and reject pornography. She is a popular guest on radio and TV broadcasts as well as podcasts and webinars. She is a leader in the Safeguard Alliance of the National Coalition to End Sexual Exploitation and has testified before the Washington State Senate Law and Justice Committee on the public health crisis of pornography. Kristen continues to be a strong voice for protecting children from all forms of sexual exploitation. With over 100,000 copies sold worldwide, her books are a valuable resource to help children develop an internal filter for inappropriate content.
Kristen is the mother of two daughters, and a son who is waiting for her in heaven. Her latest honor is becoming a grandma! She lives with her husband and sassy chocolate Schnoodle puppy in the beautiful state of Washington. Kristen earned a B.A. in English Literature and an M.A. in Organizational Communication.
Thanks for reading these show notes! If you found this podcast episode helpful, please share it through social media links below!
I’m grateful for my readers, and would love to connect. You can subscribe to my blog for a weekly update on anything new I’ve published, say hi on Facebook , or find me on Instagram, Twitter, or Pinterest.
My book, BOY MOM, was released in August of 2019 (Waterbrook Multnomah Publishers) and is full of practical advice and helpful resources for raising boys. It’s a great study for small groups!
Order it here*: Boy Mom: What Your Son Needs Most from You
*affiliate link. If you purchase books through my website I make a fraction off each purchase. Thank you!
Nice podcast and totally agree with all of it. Minds can be easily corrupted if not guided properly.
Hi, this was a really great podcast. A friend of mine sent it to me after i told her of an ordeal with my 13 year old son (i have 2 other boys: 10yrs and 3yrs), when we discovered he had been looking at ‘bad pictures’. We had the conversation with him, and will continue to do so, indeed our children are worth it! I am probably too late for the give away pack, but i would really like a copy of the books and will share it with several other mums-of-boys around me.
God bless you!
I only realized how important this topic is when I listened to this podcast. Thank you for bringing this up. I never knew how to speak about it with kids, but I hope this will help. Our sons are still little, but me and my husband are determined to speak about it with them. The first one is about to enter the primary school in autumn and I hope he will be prepared by then.
This was such a great and informative episode! I will definitely be talking with son about pornography so he will be equipped for the future. It’s such a scary thought, but thank you for talking about this and giving so many great resources to help us parents equip our kids the best way!
I have one boy, age 3, and I’m expecting a girl in August. These statistics scare me so much but this podcast has been such an encouragement on what to do and how to trust God with it. I haven’t talked about pornography with my son yet but I plan on it as soon as I get the book. Thank you both for sharing and for all you do.
Yes! I have talked with my boys about this and I love the Good Pictures, Bad Pictures book for doing this! This resource is phenomenal.
Yes! Have talked to all four of my kids about pornography and have learned the hard way to never stop talking about it!
I have a five year old son and two younger daughters. This seems like such a helpful tool to utilize for a conversation I’ve not been looking forward to. Thank you for this podcast and book series!
Wow! I have three boys 8, 7, and 3 and I didn’t even think to talk to them about this at these ages! It is a scary world we live in and I know how devastating this addiction can be! I plan on informing them of these dangers! Thank you for sharing such a great podcast!!
I’m a mom of 3 boys (8, 6 and almost 2). I remember searching for cute Halloween songs to teach my oldest when he was a toddler when a very graphic commercial popped on the screen instead. Thankfully, he wasn’t watching yet but it planted a seed in my mind to be careful. My husband and I mention what to do if someone shows us a picture or if we see one online that makes our “heart or belly feel weird,” but I still pray that when (I so badly wish I could say if right there instead) they should see something they know how to react. I Know I need to bring it up more often though.
I have two boys (3.5 and 1.5) and it really never crossed my mind to have this conversation with them so young! Thank you for sounding the warning. I plan to introduce the topic as soon as possible!
I need help with this topic to talk to my pre- teen son.
Monica, thanks so much for addressing this topic- such an intense one, scary for us mamas, and one that requires active planning and intentional parenting. I am the mom of two boys, a three year old and a five year old, and I identified so much with your comments on this podcast; I may have even cried listening to some of these statistics.
I just heard about “Good pictures, Bad pictures” earlier this week, at a Mom’s Group I am a part of. It definitely seems like appropriate timing that I went to listen to your podcast for this week- and this was the exact topic.
I will be ordering this book, and teaming with my husband to stand guard in protecting/teaching/preparing our boys to deal with this topic that is not going to go away.
Thanks again!
I will be ordering- that is…unless I WIN a bundle😉🙏🏼
I have not talked to my kids about pornography yet. They are 9(girl), 5, and 3(boys). I plan to order the books today!
Thank you Monica for providing this valuable information! I listened to your conversation with Kristen several times, Making sure I did not miss anything. I have two boys, one about to turn 6. I am debating on whether I should get the JR book for younger children or the one that is for older children. This is definitely a pod cast that I will be forwarding to other friends and I just recently bought your book, Boy Mom and I can’t put it down. You and your ministry is truly a God sent! Thank you for all your work!
Nica, that is sooo good to hear. Bless you. I think either book will be useful, (buy both if you can) but the older one would be useful for all of the years I believe (if you just get one.) You can skim over the more complicated parts (brain stuff) and still communicate using the beautiful pictures and simple message in it! And you’ll be entered to win the bundle as well! 🙂
Aloha Monica!
Kristen is so great! Thanks for sharing your conversation with her. I’ve been wanting to buy her books, maybe I’ll win a bundle 🤞🏽.
My oldest son is turn 3 next week and he’s big on reading so I’m excited to add the jr book to our rotation and get this conversation going early 😊
Thank you for blessing me through your podcast! I look forward to hearing from you and friends each week!
Hi. I really loved this last episode. I always wish that my sons will never watch Porn, but I hadn’t thought about how to talk to them about it. Thank you so much for talking about it. Hopefully I win a bundle of these books, and if not I probably will buy them.
Blessings, Andrea Toews (a boy mom too 😉)
I read this. Ok to our boys back in 2016 when they were 10 & 8. Shortly after we read it we were at the NFL combine with our boys and the cheerleaders were waking around. Our youngest pointed and loudly said “pornography!” And looked away. 🤣. I’ve lended it out and never got it back. 🙁 great book. Thinking about buying again and rereading with my boys.
Cindi– Oh my goodness, out of the mouth of babes, right!? So good! Yes, you need another copy for sure. Blessings and thanks for sharing your great story! XO
New listener here! As a boymom of 3 little guys, this touches my heart and bring tears to my eyes. Thank you so much for using your gifts and resources to equip all parents on what can seem like a tough topic to broach for boys and girls. We have begun these conversations with our boys and strive to keep the door open! Hugs and blessings to you both!
I love your podcast!
I have 2 boys (ages 6 and almost 11).
My husband I have had had small conversations here and there with our oldest about pornography, but nothing like this. I heard about your books on a different podcast months ago and want to order them, but our finances are extremely tight right now and I have been unable to afford them yet.
I have had the books waiting in my amazon cart for when we can purchase them…
But I realize that we need those books ASAP.
Our oldest is moving into middle school in the fall and we feel like we have not prepared him at all.
Thank you Rebekah! You are definitely entered in the giveaway contest. Meanwhile I think you’ll also appreciate all that you find over at the Protectyoungminds.com website! 🙂 Blessings
Hi Monica! I purchased both of these books three years ago but honestly was afraid to read past the junior book even though my kids were at the age recommended for the older kids book. After listening to this podcast I feel encouraged and equipped to go ahead and open the Older kids good pictures bad pictures book because my kids deserve it and I do feel it’s my responsibility and my gift to them. Thank you so much for this podcast it was just what I needed! I’m going to listen to it a second time with my notebook and take specific notes to pass on to friends in hopes that they will listen to this podcast with an open mind. We can do this!
Awww, thank you Michele! And good for you. I think you’ll be relieved at how NOT intimidating the book is! 🙂 And bless you for wanting to share with friends. That is awesome. XO
I haven’t had a blatant conversation with them yet but I plan on it ASAP!
This conversation was soo good! I have 3 boys 3 and under and this is something I already am thinking about with them! Thank you for helping me feel more equipped in handling this issue and being encouraged to have conversations with them early on and throughout the years to come.
This was very informative and helps ease my mind that there is a practical way to approach this topic! My son is only 2 and very limited access to a device at this point but will definitely keep these books in mind when it comes time to address this. Will also plan to add filters to all of our devices!
I was shaken to hear the story of the 9 year old boy who saw “bad pictures” on his friend’s phone – my oldest son (of three!) is 9, and he rides the bus from the primary school to Intermediate school. Although he does not have a phone, he told me the other day he sits next to a boy who brings HIS phone on the 6-minute bus ride. You’ve inspired me to talk to him (and his brothers) tonight. I’ve been a blog visitor for a few years and am currently diving into your Boy Mom book. Since most of my friends have daughters and I hail from an all-girl home, it’s been comforting to come to this space to learn more about the boy mind and how to respond to it. I only wish we lived closer so I could meet you for coffee!
so glad to hear this G!! 🙂 So happy you are opening this conversation with your kids! Way to go. And thank you for reading Boy mom — hope it brings you lots of encouragement!
Wish we could meet for coffee too. Big hugs!
This is such an essential issue, I have a group of mom friends who all have first-born sons and this is something we often worry and converse about. We are always looking for new approaches to fight against porn’s easy availability. Thank you for putting words that I could not formulate myself about this for discussion with my tweens!! I have spoken to my son about sex using the God’s Plan books you recommended. I have the whole series and it is something my son thanked me for sharing with him. I think it demystified this topic that had become attractive through its mystery. But reading about it and discussing it in the open helped put the topic in its place, its a beautiful part of human nature! I believe the Good Pictures Bad Pictures book does the same, sets the topic in perspective and makes it easier to talk about it so we can work on minimizing it in their lives as they work towards becoming productive adults. Kudos for bringing this scary topic up!!
Oh I love this. Thank you for taking time to comment. Well done and keep up the great work!! XO
Thank you so much for your candidness on this difficult, but needful topic. I ordered “Good Pictures Bad Pictures” to read my 11-yr-old son and 9 and 3-yr-old daughters. Thank you for encouraging moms to be vigilant and the reminder to not be weary in doing right!
Wow! Thank you! As mom of two young boys and teacher to 2nd graders, this is SO needed. This is a hard topic to swallow and think about and you’ve given words to what we want and need to say. The song “Oh be careful little eyes what you see…” is running through my mind.
Oh so glad to hear that!! Thank you Bailey! 🙂
We haven’t had a full conversation with out 3 yr old but we have mentioned the idea of good v bad things that he may seen. I can’t believe the statistics! My husband and I are definitely going to make sure we make this a daily part of our conversation with our little guy.
Thank you so much for having Kristen on! I’ve been following your blog for years, so we have the ‘jr’ book – but this episode reminded me to get the book for older kids (and adults). Thank you both for giving us the words and courage to talk about this with our kids!!
Wow, today’s podcast was incredibly eye opening! I have 3 boys ages 10, 9, & 7. We’ve talked about their use of the internet & what to do if/when they stumble upon something “inappropriate”, but we’ve never labeled it PORN! Until today, it never occurred to me to call it what it is & I’m not sure why? Well, actually I am sure why…. clearly I’m uncomfortable saying THAT word. After listening, I immediately pulled up my Amazon app & prime ordered ‘Good Pictures, Bad Pictures’! Momma’s pulling out her old rocker & it’s back to “read-a-loud” – beginning March 5! Thank you for your insight & encouragement in educating our sons about the dangers of porn.
I love this Heather!! Thank you for commenting. Well done, Momma!!
My kids are only 4 and 6 but I have already told them about bad pictures on the internet.
That Mum and Dad need to help them with youtube songs/crafts/monster trucks etc
They know Mum and Dad fit like a puzzle for babies also 🙂 (Farm visits started the chat… does dad get the sperm up with his fingers haha) don’t think they get it quite yet but know its only when Married.
SO good!! Thank you Chloe!! 🙂
Hello!! I just discovered your podcast a couple of weeks ago and this episode was sooooooo important to me! I have 3 boys (10,9,6) and my oldest son recently had access to the internet without my consent and we found that he did some searches for naked women. Thankfully I have heard other wonderful podcasts of christian moms who had encouraged me not to freak and be calm but I still and treading unfamiliar territory and need help with these books! I will be talking to my older two sons TODAY about good pictures and bad pictures and plan to order the book if I am not selected. I need help!! I love my sons and the Lord too much to sit around and do nothing to help my boys with the dangers of pornography
Oh so glad to hear the timing is good for this, Tiffany. Blessings and keep up the great work. 🙂
Monica, I have enjoyed receiving your emails for several years now, love your advice and feel a connection as a fellow mom of boys. This podcast episode is so timely as I learned last week that my youngest has been exposed to pornography at hang outs with friends. We have since discussed aspects of this but I am going to buy the book and use it as a guide to further this important discussion.
I am sharing this episode with other friends with young kids.
Thank you for this perfectly timed podcast.
Oh I am so sorry to hear that, but so glad you are on it now. What you do with the situation can make a huge difference in your son’s future. bless you. (and thank you for sharing!)
I have kids ages turning 8, 6, 4, and 2 and a baby due in June. I talked to my oldest 2 years ago using Good pictures bad pictures (I didn’t know there was a littler kid version!) we just got thru the first half because she wasn’t ready for the whole book but I found the approach so insightful. The principles for dealing with mental battles are truly proven from psychology. I’ve continued talking to her and my boys about issues related to sex and plan to use the book again (actually this episode is a good reminder to put a reserve on the library’s copy!) thank you!
Pick me! We love good pictures bad pictures and have talked with our boys since they were young (like 5). What to do and who to tell, etc. they’ve responded well and even sometimes come show me something the think is bad (which is not) and it allows us to have good conversation.
With boys 6, 3, and 1.5, I shudder at the thought of how often images with chase them down and how early this will start. I have not started discussing good/bad pictures with my oldest, we have always be open about truth about our bodies and how to respect ours and others bodies. I feel encouraged to continue this and then to open the door for how to prepare my boys for what they will see in this area. Thank you for bringing this conversation to us!
Monica, this episode was so good!! I have the jr version of the book and have read it to my 5 year old off and on over the last year. God Bless you, Jessica
I was so excited to see this was your topic this week. A friend in our community group recently found out her 8-year-old girl had stumbled upon porn and it started a good conversation among the mommies within that group. One mom bought the jr. version of this book and we’be been sharing it among the group. We just read it to my 2 boys (5 & 7) two nights ago. They took the information very well, which just proved once again these conversations always seem much more intimidating to parents than they really need to be since kiddos often don’t have any negative context to go with the information yet. So, it was a good foundation-building conversation to start the dialogue and keep it going. Thank you!
Yes!! Thank you for sharing all of that!! Love to hear it. And hope the 8 yr. old girl didn’t get too far into things…What a sad story!
I haven’t talked to my kids about porn yet. They are 10 and 12. I need to do this ASAP! Thank you SO much for this podcast and addressing a hard topic. I can’t wait to get the book and start talking about this.
Oh so glad you could tune in!! Thank you for commenting! XO
I have a three year old son, and we limit his exposure to screens as often as possible. So, at this point, we haven’t yet talked to him about “bad pictures,” however we DEFINITELY will!! Can’t wait to share these books with him at that point!
This book would be a God send for me to open the chapter on this topic with my son!
I have not heard of this book. I am excited to look into it and use it as a tool. We have spoken to our 11 year old boy about bad pictures but not our 8 year old girl. They don’t really have access to the internet at our home (we homeschool) but that probably is somewhat of a false sense of security. We will be having this conversation with both of them again/for the first time and would love to have this book to use.
Awesome. Thank you Leslie! So glad you were able to listen and hope this resource is helpful to you!
Thank you so much for sharing this. As the momma of all boys (7 yrs, 4 yrs, and baby boy #3 coming in 3 weeks) this topic is so overwhelming and terrifying. I can’t tell you how thankful I am for you both, sharing this and helping moms of little boys navigate through this sinful world we’re raising our babies in! I would absolutely love the books mentioned above and hope I get a copy! Thank you!
I have two boys ages 6 and 7 and we first talked about “bad pictures” when they were about 2 and 3 years old. And we’ve talked about it MANY times since! We’ve read about the foolish, seductive woman portrayed in Proverbs 7 and 9 often and contrasted her with a wise woman. I talk with my boys about what to do when they see “bad pictures” and we keep an ongoing open dialogue about it when we’re walking through stores, standing in a checkout line, or even just getting the mail. They know it might come when they least expect it. I hope and pray they will be prepared! Thank you for shedding light on this important topic!!
Well done, Brittany! Love the Proverbs example — so helpful!! Bless you, keep it up!!
Love love love Kristen and her protect young minds emails and books. Would love a set! We have already talked to our young boys about bad pictures and good pictures and share the book with our friends
We have four Young children and have loved Good Pictures/Bad Pictures. My youngest dance around the kitchen acting out the motions to what they do if they saw something that was bad. 😀 I would love another copy as I heard it was updated since I last bought the book!