End of Winter Coffee Date. Edition: We’ve got a Table with a View and SO much to Cover!
Friends…Most of you know by now how I love a coffee date! I try to do these seasonally, and by the time I sit down to write them I’m about to burst with all of the thoughts, questions, and stories to share.
I can’t help but smile as I begin to type…imagining you right here, and I’m leaning in to ask: Where should we even start!? How are you? What’s new? Can you even believe it’s March already!? Aand Shhh – We’re gonna have this coffee date on the front porch of my friend Jen’s house, ok? (I actually had coffee here yesterday.) Grab your drink and pull up a chair…I think you’ll like the view and I’m pretty sure Jen won’t mind…
(dreamy, right? )
Next I’d ask you how’s your winter been? Cold? Snowy? Do yo love it or hate it? 🙂
And then I’d tell you (though you won’t feel the least bit sorry for me) that it’s been darned-cold here in Hawaii this winter. Like, Ugg boots and hoodies in-the-house cold. (I’d remind you that we don’t have heaters here so don’t be judging.)
Finally I’d dive into my updates, reminding you that YOU get to click on comments at the bottom and tell me something from your end! (I’ll send a Starbucks card to one commenter next week. Which I know isn’t exactly Jen’s front porch, but it’s something!)
Here’s my news in no particular order:
If you’re on social media you might have seen…
- I had Frozen Shoulder and what even is that!?
(If this is not interesting to you, feel free to skip this bullet point entirely. no hard feelings. 😉 )
My new public service announcement: Frozen shoulder is no joke. Seriously guys, I feel like we’ve all heard of it, but who really knew what Frozen Shoulder was? (not me) Well now I know so now you must know as well…
Frozen shoulder (“Adhesive Capsulitis”) I have learned…is a condition that causes the capsule around your entire shoulder joint to tighten up (basically like scar tissue) making your shoulder very tight and painful. The cause of frozen shoulder is a bit of a medical mystery; it seems to have a genetic component (my dad had it at my age too,) however it is more common in women than men (and it’s also more common in Asians.) It almost always hits between the ages of 40 and 60. Oh, and this fact I’m hoping to disprove: If you get it in one shoulder, you are likely to get it in the other shoulder within a year or two. (what!??)
Well, I started having symptoms last June, but it wasn’t until the new year that I finally saw an orthopedic doctor who diagnosed it quickly and gave me a few treatment options…
We started with Physical Therapy and stretching at home, but that is a slow and painful process. There was not much progress (and did I mention it was painful?) so the doctor recommended I go with “MUA “manipulation under anesthesia. With MUA they numb up your arm (and give you happy meds in an IV), then the doctor cranks moves your arm in every direction to break up the tight capsule. You can actually hear it snap-crackle-and pop, which would be quite disconcerting if it weren’t for the “happy meds”. 2 minutes later, you’re done. Still numb, and happy, but the capsule is all released. Amazing!
I’m so glad I did it! I have more PT and lots of stretching ahead of me, but I’m happy to say that I can once again stand in the “Mom position” (hands on hips), and I can almost reach an itch on my back again. (important.) I highly recommend MUA for Frozen Shoulder and the end.
Enough about that, let’s move on…
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I’ve been speaking to Moms and loving it…(especially when they live on Maui.)
Recently I’ve had the chance to speak to a few groups of moms, sharing nuggets from the chapters of my Boy Mom book. It’s been such a blast! Last week I was able to take a quick trip to Maui and spoke to moms from Hope Chapel Kihei. Oh my heart, I loved every one of them and I just hope they invite me back. Like tomorrow.
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And, about that PODCAST…
At some point in our coffee date, (being the good friend that you are,) you might remind me that I announced that I’d be starting a podcast, and you wonder — was I joking or is it actually gonna happen? To which I’d say: Friend: What was I even thinking!? haha! But yes. I’m truly getting closer and closer and I’m pretty sure it will become a real thing. My equipment is all set up and it looks very cool. (which matters for something, right?) So, hopefully by late spring I’ll be kicking off…
“The Boy Mom Podcast with Monica Swanson” Woot woot!I have some ideas for the first few episodes, but I’d definitely appreciate your thoughts for the future: Do you like interview shows? Short and sweet, or longer/deeper shows? Any particular boy-related topic you’d like me to cover? Share in comments please!
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THEN I’d say: Hey, friend! Would you come if I hosted a retreat in Hawaii?
(Hopefully you’d squeal and say: “YES! I totally would!” )
I’ve been dreaming of this for years, but somehow in this new year I’ve felt like it’s getting closer to being a reality. I don’t know the specifics, but let’s just imagine together: renting a big home and inviting 10-20 women to join me for an extended weekend of encouraging talks, eating amazing, locally sourced food, beach walks….and maybe a massage or a surf lesson tucked in there…then plenty of time to just reflect and rest and soak in some sun and sand and quiet. So….WHO’S interested? LMK in comments!
I’d love for you to at least start dreaming with me…praying…planning (maybe saving!? ) I’m already looking into locations and caterers and all the rest, so if enough of you are interested, I should be able to crunch some numbers and share more down the road. But just so you know: THIS MAKES ME SO EXCITED!!
(Hopefully you’d squeal and say: “YES! I totally would!” )Of course our coffee date would include a speed-round of catch-up on all of the other things…Our kids and our husbands and our parents…our need for a housecleaner and our pelvic floor issues (coffee dates are not a time to be shy…) I’d have to mention how proud I am of Jonah, who will be graduating in May! (he’s planning a gap year so I won’t be getting sad yet ;)) and Luke…
WAIT! What was that on social media about Luke’s surfing? That’s when I’d say it’s a really great story and I cannot WAIT to tell you about it, but we are out of time so we MUST plan another coffee date soon. I’ll try to put together a brief update (complete with video for your kids to watch :)) soon. I honestly think his story will encourage all of us.
We always have to exchange what we’ve been reading, so here’s what I’d tell you:
- A Lent study by Jennie Allen: Made for This: 40 Days to Living Your Purpose
- Your Future Self Will Thank You: Secrets to Self-Control from the Bible and Brain Science (A Guide for Sinners, Quitters, and Procrastinators) SO GOOD!! Author Drew Dyck is an incredible writer and a funny guy (he is seriously one fo the main reasons I still drop into Twitter…) This book is insightful, convicting in a good way, and inspiring!
- Memory-Making Mom: Building Traditions That Breathe Life Into Your Home: Oh what a sweet and encouraging book! It just released and I’m going to say that every Mom I know should get this!
- Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy: Though I don’t call myself an introvert, I’m pretty sure we all have some “introvert qualities”! I’m a big fan of author, Jamie Martin (she writes the Simple Homeschool blog.) If you consider yourself an introvert, and you’re a mom: you need this.
- This book just came in the mail, and from first glance I can say it’s covering some important relational ground: Relational Reset: Unlearning the Habits that Hold You Back
- AND…. If you’re observing Lent (or just sick of Facebook!) I highly recommend joining my friend Wendy’s 40 Day Social Media Fast which just started. This is gonna be so good!
SO GOOD!! Author Drew Dyck is an incredible writer and a funny guy (he is seriously one fo the main reasons I still drop into Twitter…) This book is insightful, convicting in a good way, and inspiring!
: Oh what a sweet and encouraging book! It just released and I’m going to say that every Mom I know should get this!
: Though I don’t call myself an introvert, I’m pretty sure we all have some “introvert qualities”! I’m a big fan of author, Jamie Martin (she writes the Simple Homeschool blog.) If you consider yourself an introvert, and you’re a mom: you need this. We’d hug and I’d make sure to remind you that though this season may be exhausting, I know you are doing a really good job. I’d tell you that God sees every little thing you do to serve your people and I know He is working things out for your good and His glory. (Galations 6:9 is on a card in my purse 🙂 )
I’d have to pull out my latest favorite from Instagram (@Joshshipp shared this) because my husband and I have laughed at this about 500 times this week and we feel like Jim is our friend. Or maybe we ARE JIM…
Then we’d step back into Jen’s living room and realize maybe we don’t want our coffee date to end so we decide to move into Jen’s house and live happily ever after. 
Or so we can dream…
LEAVE ME A COMMENT AND ENTER TO WIN A STARBUCKS CARD!
Tell me anything new…What’s new on your end…suggestions for my podcast…do you want to come to a retreat in Hawaii? Tell me what you’re reading or how you’re feeling. I love hearing from you and I read every single comment that comes in!
(I’ll pick a winner next Tuesday and email you directly.)
Hugs and love,
Would love a retreat – raising a 16 yo (technically my grandson) and many learning challenges but learning strategies and how to overcome and excel in those challenges, especially when using his passions for much of the curriculum. My daughter (adopted at 11 from Kazakstan) would love to come as well. She’s a new mom with a 1 year old and I want to encourage her in her new journey!
Also caretaking a 94 yo father~
Reading and listening to many books at once – my problem is finishing them because then I see new ones. I’m like the “squirrel” the dog sees when finding new books!
Hawaii retreat sounds incredible!
Wow! you have a lot going on. Spring is coming and I am getting busy too! Life is now packed with horseback riding, cleaning and school-work. I hope your doing great!
Love,
Emma
Oooh – I look forward to your podcast! Writing this on another chilly day in South Dakota, so dreaming of a retreat in Hawaii is just the ticket 🙂
You inspire me! I love the coffee date catch ups! Just heard surfing is going to be an Olympic sport! Could Luke be an Olympian? Wowza! All is good ( albeit super chilly) in Illinois. Rolling out the welcome mat for spring and longingly looking forward to a little spring break getaway to northern Florida. It won’t be balmy- but the seventies sound dreamy as I shiver under this blanket and sip tea. News in our family… Hmm… all is calm, which makes me nervous to say. We are thinking of adding more chaos with a second dog to keep our lonely pup company. Heaven help me!
I live in MN. I am over winter! (so.much.shoveling…..but the boys (8, 10, 12) have built some amazing snow forts – so there’s that!) To escape winter, the fam and I will be driving to Hilton Head Island, SC at the end of the week to dip our toes into the Atlantic Ocean and exchange boots for flip-flops, yay!!
As for the podcast, I’d love for you to do a panel-interview with your sons (mainly 3 oldest) to hear how they have enjoyed their homeschooling. I think it would be super for to listen to with my sons!
Pick me!! I’ll come to Hawaii!
Books I’ve been reading: a few gals and I have been getting together once a week to discuss “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality” by Peter Scazzero. It’s been really good; deep stuff. Also, just finished “Classic Christianity” by Bob George – it’s an oldie but a goodie!
and, read aloud with my sons: “Prince Warrior” series by Priscilla Shirer – A-MAZING! Love how she writes and engages us all in wanting to put on the armor of God!
Yes!! To the retreat! 🤗
I would love to have coffee with you! I am reading Overcomer by Dr David Jeremiah and Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson
Desperate is a wonderful book and so is Different based on her son Nathan!
YESS! I would
Love to come for a retreat. Wow !! Please do this 😃
I would definitely come to a retreat in Hawaii! Woohoo!!
Jen’s living room view is amazing!
As you talk about kids going off to college, my guy is preparing for high school. He’s finishing up middle school on some good notes, and I am confident that he will do well in high school. It’s just, where does the time go? I am sure that I will blink and be sending him off to college or trade school or a gap year or whatever. Yikes!
Hi from San Diego! My oldest is a boy & turning 12 this May. I teach some fitness classes at a really cool gym (Ray & Joan Kroc Center through the Salvation Army). Love your stuff! My husband is a stand-up comedian, he tours with John Crist, Tim Hawkins, Michael Jr, etc. : )
I’d listen to your podcast. Teens and tweens are my focus- ugh the hormones!!
My favorite thought this week:
Do I want to be “right” or do I want to be “reconciled”? Pretty much a perfect question for any relationship!
Hello! I’m a mom of four boys living in chilly Minnesota. My husband works in leadership development for Target Corp and I’m a stay-at-home mama. I prefer warm weather, but by God’s grace, the cold, long winter has been enjoyable. My oldest son is just 11, so I’m enjoying (and learning from) your blog. I’d love a Hawaiian retreat someday!
I can’t wait for your podcast and book! We are living in the UK but I would save up to come to Hawaii!
Tonight I sit in my warm house, on my comfy couch, under a cozy, soft blanket praising God it’s FRIDAY!
Once again God has been so good – He knows what a week it was! Even knows what my next week will be, but no worries- He’s got it covered!
For me, whatever God leads you to share will be perfect Monica!
Always so uplifted to get your emails – your writing style and photos are delightful!
And hearing the birds chirping and singing so much more the last few days here in Ohio has blessed my soul! Looking forward to Spring sweet Spring!
My mom had frozen shoulder a few yeara ago! It’s awful. I’ll have to mention your therapy to her because her other shoulder is pretty stiff lately…
Definitely would love to hear a podcast! and boy mom tips and navigating college time /senior year, etc!
Hi Monica love reading your post especially your optimistic and uplifting words. Going through a rough patch with my 13 year old so I have not had time for myself. Just got a book about positive parenting; let’s what techniques I can use to reshape things. I would so need this type of retreat. An idea for podcast would be: how do keep sane with four boys; The things that you do uplift yourself; positive self talk
Hi Monica,
I love podcasts and I especially love ones that are about 15-20 minutes long and on specific topics. I look forward to listening to yours right from the get-go!
I want to go on your retreat! I need it. And I am going to guess that Luke’s update has to do with new sponsors?? I heard something about something between my husband and my son.
Podcast I think you should interview your favorite fatherhood and travel writer. LOL
I think as moms we always give. We give to our husbands, children, friends, and mentor those that are younger than us. My mom was asking me on Wednesday what I was fasting from during Lent. I honestly didn’t have an answer for her b/c I feel like I am already giving so much that instead of fasting from something….I need to be focusing more on filling myself up with God’s Love and Truth! So that is what I am focusing on during Lent. More focus on spending time with the Lord and having Him fill my cup b/c I am at a season in life that is really HARD
Hi, friend! I wish we could have coffee face to face 🙂 I can’t wait for your podcast to come out! I would love to hear about remaining calm as a mom in sticky moments. I am currently reading “Preach to Yourself” by Hayley Morgan and loving it! I’m also making my way through the Chronological Bible In a Year plan, and about to start “Peaceful Parent, Happy Child” by Dr. Laura Markham.
I would be so interested in this retreat! Depending on price, I think that would be amazing. Lately I’ve been feeling stretched thin, and your word about God seeing me was just so encouraging. Thanks, Monica 🙂
You are so inspirational!!! We are cold and gloomy here in Ohio, so I always look forward to your blogs and posts!!
Sara
It is so great to hear all is well with you and your boys! I am looking forward to the podcast. Anything about parenting is always welcome. I am sorry to hear it is cold out there. It is damp and rainy in Oakdale, except today.
I am looking forward to baseball season with the kids and gardening season for me.
Thank you for the words of encouragement. Parenting is so overwhelming but so wonderful too. I will read Introverted Mom. I happen to be very Introverted and now the kids are getting older I find it hard for me to bond with others. Mostly I always feel like I say too much or not enough.
I am still soon as excited for Boy Mom!
Thank you again for sharing your wisdom.
Since I have a frozen shoulder myself, it was very interesting for me to read how yours was treated. MUA has not been mentioned yet, we first want to try PT. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for stopping in and seriously — you MUST look into MUA! I actually read through your blog and story and you are a really fun and creative person/writer. Glad you tracked all of your experiences! 🙂 I feel a bond with you because I relate to all that you share. 🙂 PT and stretching are just so painful and slow…If you can get the MUA I say do it. (Not all doctors do it, apparently, but I see absolutely no reason not to! It is quick and effective. All I can think is sometimes the medical system wants to drag things out so everyone makes more $$…(PT, docs, more MRI’s etc…) I recommending getting it over with as soon as possible! Keep me posted, all the best to you!
Hi Monica!! How I wish we could have these coffee dates in real life!!! Perhaps someday, Lord willing 🙏🏼💕 but for now, I would SO LOVE to join you if you do decide to do the island retreats! Can’t wait to hear all the details and sign up and go!!! 😆😆😆😁
Also, I am excitedly waiting for those podcasts… blessings to you in that! And please have your husband join you, perhaps to address the dads. And maybe your sons could do some podcasts for boys??
I’d also tell you I’m so glad your shoulder is doing better! I can’t even imagine not being able to do the “mom stand” 😆😆
I am strongly considering homeschooling my two youngest next year, not even sure how to go about that so I’d definitely ask for you advice.
Also, I would tell you that my cousin just got diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer, and it’s also spread to other organs as well…. maybe one year to live…. so we are all pretty crushed right now… but I put my trust in the Lord and not even sure how to deal…. 🙏🏼😭
Then I would tell you that we are coming with the kids to Oahu in beginning of April and can hardly wait!!!! We have had a very cold winter here in the Seattle area, it’s snowing right now too. My back and joints are not happy with this cold either 🥶 ❄️
Alright dear Monica, praying the highest blessings over you and your family and all that the Lord has planned for you 💕💕💕
Thank you for the coffee dates, I absolutely love them!!!!
My son is leaving in a few weeks with the high school band for Hawaii and I am so bummed I cant go with! I did give up facebook for lent as well, but I am going to have to break my fast during his trip for updates. ( because i know he wont update me himself )
Sounds wonderful … i’d He interested I. The retreat! ❤️💕
Monica- I enjoyed our coffee date. ‘-) and Love the view. I so miss Maui. We were able to visit my mother-in-law for several years in Jan/Feb and were able to escape the East coast winters for a few weeks.
I love the idea of a retreat. I wonder if you would like to add daily fitness classes for your participants? I would love to come teach classes as part of your retreat. I own my own fitness business (10 years) and teach many different types of fitness classes. I am mother to a boy and girl..both teens….I so appreciate all your insights and can’t wait for you to start your podcast! I just turned 50 and am excited for this coming year and looking forward to what God as planned for me.
Needed this today as I sit here not enjoying the never ending winter we are currently experiencing. Snow is deep, Kids are crazy and my mental health might not survive. I think I am Jim…except I am almost 40(St. Patrick’s Day). I also think a retreat is a wonderful idea. Make sure that it is winter here when you do it so it is an extra getaway. Will be excited to hear some details!